My Immortal
by The Half Mad Muggle
Summary: Voldemort contemplates Snape's betrayal.


My Immortal

**AN: OK. So, everyone always writes stories about the poor Severus Snape who suffers so much at the hands of the evil Lord Voldemort and the dastardly Albus Dumbledore. WON'T SOMEONE PLEASE THINK OF VOLDY? Yes. I have thought of Voldemort and what he thinks about Snape and his absence from Voldemort's glorious return in the Goblet of Fire...NOT SLASH. Title from the Evanescence song, as is one line in the story. **

**Thought I would give something else a go you see!**

**Enjoy. SS19 xxx**

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I should be rejoicing. My return to full form—human form—has been successful thanks to the efforts of that pitiful coward Wormtail. How I despise him.

But still; I should be triumphant. And I am. Here is the beginning of the end.

And yet. My thoughts keep returning...to him.

The absence from the circle was so clear to me; I never thought that it would be him. He couldn't have ignored all the signs, after all.

Severus Snape. My favourite. The others hated him, simply because I liked him. In the good old days, we stood together. Wherever I walked, he was there in my shadow. Whenever I turned, he was there beside me.

When I returned from battles and orders and fights, he was there, waiting for me.

Like I expected him to be this time.

I feel betrayed.

I hear he works for Dumbledore now. The deepest cut of all—someone so keen on Pureblood supremacy, working for that Muggle loving fool?

But of course, this could all be my fault—I sent him there in the first place.

I never thought he would turn from me.

I will destroy him for his lack of loyalty; I will hurt him for his mistake. That is fair enough, I think.

I will never show him how much he has hurt me, though.

Thinking about hurting him helps. I can pretend now, the beautiful Cruciatus...

He won't scream. He never does scream—he has too much dignity.

But I could break him.

I wonder when I will next see him? He must be scared, like the scum Karkaroff. Dumbledore will be protecting him.

I don't understand. Do I feel like I am missing something? Why does his decision hurt me so badly?

I don't hurt. I don't feel that emotion.

I need to focus on other things. Azkaban, for a start—I need to break my followers—loyal followers—out of there.

I need to gather armies; soldiers; warriors. I need to start my reign again; from scratch.

The story will be out there by now—how Potter once again defied my touch. But that does not matter; the time is not right. I enjoy the boy's attempts to beat me.

I had so many questions to ask him, too. Why did he try to stop Quirrell, for a start. Why didn't he guess?

I gave him enough clues—invaded his dreams more than once.

I showed him the times we shared—the power he had—the team that we made.

I showed him how much he was appreciated.

He is not appreciated at that school—I knew that much from the body I possessed. I could feel the loneliness inside his heart—I know it too well.

I was meant to lead. He was meant to follow me. Destinies entwined.

He knew it. I knew it. Dumbledore knew it.

And here I am again, thinking about him.

_Severus_, I think. I wonder if he can still hear my voice; perhaps he cannot. _I held your hand all through those years..._I made him into who he is!

I consider the alternatives for a second in command. Lucius—a puppy dog; Wormtail, a coward; Crabbe and Goyle too stupid to complement my intelligence.

Severus...humorous and determined and brave. Brave enough to tell me when I was being foolish; clever enough to hold his tongue when I was wrong.

Perhaps I simply miss him. I will miss him.

That is why he will suffer when I next see him. Somehow I shall draw him away from Hogwarts. I will destroy him, from the inside out; I shall break his mind, which means so much to him; I shall tear his soul apart.

I do not have to just use the Cruciatus. Memories and Dementors will play their own part, of course.

I will make him scream for me. It will be a fun task to carry out.

A knock at my door. I do not wish to see anyone, not yet. But I turn anyway, still thinking about the way I would break him.

And there he is. In the doorframe—head bowed, but eyes looking at me through his eyelashes.

For a moment there is silence.

He walks towards me, bows, falls to his knees—the picture of absolute devotion. The way he knows I want him.

My hand is still on my wand; I should torture him for what he has done to me. He made me wait.

But no. I ask for his excuse.

He raises his head fully; I am once again staring at the tormented pale beauty that attracted me to him in the first place.

He tells me that he could not leave due to Dumbledore—how could he leave the moment I returned? He tells me that he is sorry that he missed my glorious return, he tells me that he wanted to be with me at the moment I regained my human form.

He tells me that he still wants to serve; that he is a spy in Dumbledore's camp; that he still wishes to be my most loyal.

I stare at him. He stares back.

I know he is lying.

I know that he wants to stay on two sides, and choose the winner at the end.

I should hurt him—I should just say the word. The Cruciatus would loosen his tongue; I could make him scream my name.

But no.

"Welcome back, Severus, my closest servant."

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**AN: OK, so it is a lot of waffle. I'm sorry. I just thought...as I am so interested in the more human Voldemort....this might be another way the scene could be presented. Hope you liked it! Don't worry though, Voldy will be back to his senses soon in the next part of To Break...heh heh heh.**

**Thanks for reading!**


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